Post #3: In Which Winter Blues Happen

So, today is yet another day in Southern New York State; for you out of towners playing the home game, my relative location in relation to New York City is about an hour north. This puts me in territory cityfolk refer to as “Upstate New York,” while people who live in Buffalo and Saratoga near the Great Lakes and Canada just scoff at all of us like the plebs we are…but I digress. At this time of year, it, being a northern state in the United States of America, during the months of December, January, February and March, tends to get a lot of the white stuff, and by that I mean snow (not that other stuff you were thinkin’ about…I saw that look on your face).

This winter particularly has been quite vexing, particularly because it’s been a nearly constant stream of “Now it’s cold!” (which for us is in the negative low digit Fahrenheit range, or for you guys in the rest of the world, around -20 degrees Celsius), followed by “AND NOW YOU HAVE SNOW” piling at least several inches in height. Recently, I had friends of mine as far south as Virginia and Texas complaining about snow…and then saw what equates around here to a dusting. I wish I could’ve mustered sympathy beyond laughter.

For those of you that don’t live in snowy, winter-blown areas, you have my undying envy, as well as my ever burning jealous rage.

Yes, this is about accurate for outside right now

But as I was driving home from work today (at 15 miles per hour, swerving to avoid drivers who were foolishly braving the cold in their front-wheel drive vehicles), I started thinking about…Blizzcon.

First, let me preface this by saying, I never knew what the term “Blizzcon depression” meant until recently.

Blizzcon 2014 was my first Blizzcon, and it was an experience, like all big conventions are. My only preparation for this beforehand was GenCon in Indianapolis a couple years running in my high school years, as well as two years of New York Comic Con. Both times, I went with cool people, saw many cool interesting things, and walked away with a lot of swag…

…but I never walked away feeling both full and empty at the same time, like I did when I went to Los Angeles this past year.

In a word, Blizzcon was…well, Blizzcon. There’s really no other way I can describe it. I saw people I’d only known as forum and Twitter avatars, met guys and gals who I was only familiar with as two-dimensional webcam images in bottom corners of Twitch streams…saw one of my favorite bands since I was a little kid LIVE (and got all of my coworkers who are into thrash metal eternally jealous of me >_>), and met people whom I had grown friendly with through mutual love of one single, solitary game, and some of which even the same single, solitary brotherhood forged by class choice.

That’s really kind of amazing isn’t it?

And just like that, it was over.

And it’s just dawned on me now how fortunate I am that I got to go…and how much I’m missing that feeling of fullness now. How much I feel like I got to be a part of something so much bigger than myself…and now that it’s gone, what am I to do? Feels very cog outside of the machine…without my place in the machine, what am I doing? Where am I going?

I could go on about this for hours, and I won’t bore you. Suffice to say that rabbit hole’s got some darkness in it, but it’s getting a little more illuminated every day…just some require more flashlights than others.

I guess with regards to Blizzcon, there’s (hopefully) next year, right? 😀


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